Band Aid

The End

It's the end of my live journal and it will be missed!!

Do not fear though I have a new URL address and all old posts have been copied over so I will continue to blog.

You'll find me at visit and leave me a comment letting me know what you think.

V xx
Safe Inside Myself - Olsen

Heaven gains another angel :(

Sometimes I wonder how the world works and if infact there is a god out there or anyone at all!! Life is so incredibly cruel sometimes that I feel like any little bit of belief I ever had has been shaken out of me!!

Another CF warrior lost her battle - Lauren 19 years old

When I loose someone from the CF or transplant world that has impacted me I feel like I loose a little bit of heart. Lauren was one such girl who made an impact on me, she made me feel important and that through being strong for myself, I was being strong for her! She often told me I was an inspiration of hers, to be honest I think she was one of the first to say that and I'll love her forever for that. She was a lovely girl with a big heart and deserves to still be here living the life she dreamed of!!

I hadn't heard from her in a while and let myself get wrapped up in my own silly life, I wasn't there for her like I should have been. I hope she knows that I always thought of her and wondered how she was. She was an inspiration to me and will be missed massively by all who knew and loved her.

Here is a section of a blog she posted when I got my transplant -
'I must just mention the event that our little blogging world has been squealing over - Tori finally got her lung transplant! And yes I know it's late, and everyone else has already said it, my only excuse is the unbelievably unreliable internet connection in the hospital. I am just so so happy for her, and can not believe what amazing progress she is making already. I think she was off the ventilator after just two days, and out of the intensive care unit by day 4? Even if that isnt exactly right, it was very fast. Proud of you Victoria lovely :) Just keep on getting better so you can start making the most of those shiny new puffers!
Also just a thought for the donor and their family, and a thankyou to them for saving our friend's life.'

I know she'll be up there watching us all smiling because she's free now, free as a bird or an owl (she loved owls). Keep safe and warm Lauren xx
side of the road


I started this journal way back just for me really, I kept all my posts friend locked and gave no one the link. Then when I decided I wanted to go for transplant I thought it would be the best place for my family and friends to read any news about going on the list or getting the actual operation. I still locked away my more intimate posts not wanting to burden people with the massive struggle to stay alive that I was living. At some point I decided to let the world in and opened myself up - sharing how I was feeling, I didn't post much on the subjects that got to me as I was trying my hardest to stay focussed on the positive things. I had another blog where I posted the darkest thoughts I had and lowest times (although I was open I still didn't want to burden my family with how I was feeling). I decided that from reading other blogs that I wanted to give a full and accurate account of transplant, giving out all the details including things that I wouldn't really want my father to read. I gave the link out on facebook and told people to spread the word as I wanted to raise awareness about Organ Donation. I got a great response from people and in under a year I've had 18,482 views (probably not a lot in the grand scheme of things) I felt like I was doing good and people where getting the message.

Now I feel like my journal is a bit useless and to be honest I'm not sure if that many people read it anymore. Others seem to be doing things bigger and better and what I'm doing is just fizzling out!!! I've got a new URL and am currently transferring over old post to my new layout but is there really a point? Should I just let it die out? Am I relevant anymore? Are people still out there?

V xx

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Day 3 - A picture of you and someone you miss.

This is the only picture I could find of me and my grandad. My grandad or Big Bad John as we liked to call him was one amazing guy!! I loved him to pieces and he was my favourite person (apart from my mum, dad, bro and sis) in the whole world. He passed away the year before I graduated from Uni. My sister graduated the year before me in her photo my grandad is there, in mine he's not :( His death was pretty sudden and the whole he left has never been filled.

I like to think he's been watching over me through the hole transplant journey and is looking after the angel who saved my life.

Love you always grandad xx
20's girl

Day 2 - A picture of you and someone you have been closest to for the longest.

This is one of my best friends Susan. I went through the first few years of High School not noticing her (we were in different classes) and then we both picked Standard Grade Drama. I don't think she particularly liked me at first but I charmed her and we've been friends ever since. We don't always see each other a lot but when we do it's just like old times.
Fashion red flowers

Facebook 30 Day Photo Challenge - Day 1

Day 1 - A photo of you with 15 facts about yourself.

Day 2 - A picture of you and someone you have been closest to for the longest.

Day 3 - A picture of you and someone you miss.

Day 4 - A picture of a habit you wish you didn't have.

Day 5 - A picture of somewhere you've been.

Day 6 - A picture of you fave band/artist.

Day 7 - A picture of someone/something that has had the biggest impact on your life.

Day 8 - A picture of someone who makes you laugh.

Day 9 - A picture of someone who has gotten you through the most.

Day 10 - A picture of you when you were little.

Day 11 - A picture of your celebrity crush.

Day 12 - A picture of something you love.

Day 13 - A picture of something you hate.

Day 14 - A picture of you doing something that makes you happy.

Day 15 - A picture of your family.

Day 16 - A picture of you and someone you do weird things with.

Day 17 - A picture of your favourite song.

Day 18 - A picture of your biggest insecurity.

Day 19 - A picture of something that inspires you.

Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel.

Day 21 - A picture of something that makes you happy.

Day 22 - A picture of something that confuses you.

Day 23 - A picture of something you crave.

Day 24 - A picture of yourself and a family member.

Day 25 - A picture of your favourite memory.

Day 26 - A picture of something that mean's a lot to you.

Day 27 - A picture of something you're afraid of.

Day 28 - A picture of you last year and today with a description of how you've changed.

Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile.

Day 30 - A picture of yourself.

A photo of you with 15 facts about yourself.

1. I am not a fan of chocolate
2. I love Adrian Greenier from Entourage (He's my ideal man!!)
3. My favourite movie is Meet Me In St Louis
4. I have a button phobia that Gregg thinks is ridiculous but it's valid!!
5. I used to be a corporal in the Air Cadets mainly because I had been there for ages not because I was any good.
6. My gran has an MBE
7. I have a BA Degree in Community Arts specialising in Drama and Visual Art.
8. I used to work next to the MAC counter in Frasers and would get makeovers every time we were quiet from my friend at the time Katy
9. One of my best friends is a stand up comedian.
10. I love Geishas
11. My favourite song of all time is Tiny Dancer by Elton John
12. I used to go to Buffy Conventions, sometimes I helped out at them.
13. I love LA
14. Japan is on my holiday wish list.
15. I would love to get married on a beach somewhere.
Fashion red flowers

Other Poems I Wrote Before Transplant

The Forgotten-

Isolated and alone
in a stuffy small room.
The forgotten sit waiting
with that feeling of doom.

No friends come visiting
or text to say hi.
The forgotten sit crying
wondering why.

Friends used to come knocking
with goodies galore.
But the forgotten got sicker
and they don't call anymore.

What's left are the special ones
the true and the good.
The forgottens support system
taking them whatever the mood.

We can't help but wonder
what would have been.
If the forgotten hadn't got weaker
would they have been more keen.

So alone in a room
the forgotten lie.
Whiling away the hours
until they die

The War-

Together we march into battle
we're ready for the fight.
Born into a world of evil
our spirits keep us tight.

The enemy is unseen to us
slowly breaking us down
Invading all our bodies
slowly running us into the ground.

Sometimes evil wins a battle
and we loose one of our own
Gone but not forgotten
their legacy lives on.

Us champions will win the war
we'll send it home to roast.
It can choke on it's own vomit
and live life without a host.

This may not set us free today
but it will for those who come next.
This war is for the chosen ones
to let them have a rest (?)
twinkly lights fashion


THE GREAT VALENTINES CAKE BAKE is in its THIRD year so please help us to make it the best one yet!

What's it about?
Love it or hate it, it's that time of year again. Valentine's Day has crept up on us and soon we'll be surrounded with overpriced bouquets of roses and boxes of chocolates begging to be bought. How about doing something different this year? How about using Valentine's Day to do a good deed and make a difference?

Use this Valentine's Day to help us help them: Brighten up the day before - Friday 13th February- with a red-themed cake sale!

By selling your baked goodies in aid of LLTGL you can help us help the thousands of people out there desperately waiting for a transplant that could save their lives.

Can't get to or host your own cake sale? Sponsor a cake-bake by adding your donation below!

Why do it?
Live Life Then Give Life (LLTGL) is a UK charity which works hard to raise awareness about the greatest gift of all: The Gift of Life. We work hard to inform the public about organ donation and to support those in need of a transplant.

By selling your baked goodies in aid of LLTGL you can help us help the thousands of people out there desperately waiting for a transplant that could save their lives.

/Send us your photos from your workplace, school or university to win a prize for the most wild, wacky or creative cake!/

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